Monkey See Monkey Climb

Lost. The reach of my monkey. If you're going to rehab a monkey in your home, make sure you can get to him. Its important, like when you have to go to work and your monkey doesn't.

Badger Cat

Found. An animal that will rip another of its kind to shreds but is friendly towards the alma mater. Wolverines and Gophers are forewarned however, don't let the missing leg (not pictured- yes thats a pun people...I think) fool you, this thing can hone in and destroy its enemy in seconds. But he also sleeps a lot and can be catapulted across the room...only to fall asleep in seconds. So stealth is not really an issue for retaliation...

Smokey Pants

Lost. My nerve. This was the 2nd or 3rd bear we saw that day. Three was enough. Yes, I know he's small but mom had to be nearby. And he hissed at me. Hissed. Bears aren't supposed to hiss. You see those teeth? Neither do I, but I know they're there dammit.

tax dollars at work

Lost. Any semblance of intelligence. Approximately 80% (this may be conservative) of road signs in Alaska have at least one bullet hole in them. If said road sign is telling you not to do something, or such an action may bring consequences, well, you can go ahead and multiple that number by 15. Who pays for new road signs again??? (editor's note: check out my funky artwork)

Hooked

Found. The most trite pun of all time. But this guy loves to fish I tell ya. And he is good at it. When he's not catching himself.

Migraine Alert!

Found. Sage advice. My girlfriend took this course to prevent getting her head lopped off by a helicopter. It totally worked. Thanks copter safety man. Plus, I'm glad I'm not dating a 7 foot freak who can't catch her own head. You gotta look it in.

Leggo my ego

Lost. An ego. How refreshing. Anyone willing to be seen in a Mazda convertible has clearly given up. Any bets on whether or not he wears sweatpants to work?